


Break my heart again

by rednow



Series: mishandled discs and memory books (dream smp) [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: 6th jan dream smp betrayal, Angry Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Angst, Betrayal, Character Development, Dream Smp, Drunkenness, Family Dynamics, Flashbacks, Gen, Panic Attacks, Platonic Relationships, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sad Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Sleepy Bois Inc Angst, Sleepy Bois Inc as Family, Technoblade is Bad at Feelings (Video Blogging RPF), Tommyinnit's betrayal, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, anger issues, community house dream smp, potato war reference, tommyinnit is a bitch in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-14 01:21:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28663098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rednow/pseuds/rednow
Summary: Is there anything left to say at all?Scratch that.Is there anything left at all?- Or, Technoblade is betrayed by Tommy again. Again, you ask? Yeah, I feel you.Misery and hurt eventually causes him to run out of second chances to give, and something dark unlocks within him with a single click. Indeed, you guessed it right, cue the green teletubby. Philza plays the necessary dad role.Based on the Dec 6th stream, the day before Doomsday, scene set in Technoblade's Cabin.
Relationships: Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: mishandled discs and memory books (dream smp) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2140326
Comments: 12
Kudos: 190





	Break my heart again

**Author's Note:**

> sup, i worked on this for 3 hours straight staying up till 6 am. pretty fun, kinda think i was starting to relate to techno more and more as the night went on, and my last braincell flip-flopped uselessly trying to find the right references, while sad dramatic music crooned on replay in my ears.
> 
> title inspiration from FINNEAS - Break My Heart Again. hope you enjoy!

Technoblade isn’t an idiot.

Of course he hears the footsteps.

One cautious step forward. Another. 

Techno wipes his drying tears hurriedly with the sleeve of his red cloak. His eyes have never felt sorer, not even when he spent innumerable hours farming mindless potatoes last summer. He knows they will be bloodshot when he looks in the mirror.

He hears feet falter, pausing right outside his spruce front door.

“Techno?” Phil’s voice trails off. 

A brisk knock. Techno straightens himself the best he can from where he lies against the wall, wasted on the floor. He whirls to turn away and face the storage chests instead.  
  
Fucking cobwebs everywhere. He scrunches his nose in distaste. This room could do with some cleaning. Especially considering how this was where he got all his clout. Still, for now, anything better than letting Phil see him this way.

"Yeah?" He goes for casual. _Please don't come in, please don't come in._

"I'm coming in." 

Of course he would. Techno finds himself rolling his eyes despite himself.

The door creaks open with firm politeness and Techno’s turned back and neck is treated to a flinchingly cold gust of evenfall wind that blows in unwelcome. 

Philza hesitates by the gate, his swinging lantern projecting his shadow as a giant on Techno’s stack of chests. “Hey. You okay there?”

Techno wonders detachedly what he looks like right now in Philza's eyes. A pathetic mess, probably. He should be disowned.

"Techno." His father holds up the lantern in one hand, latching the door with the other before stepping into his tiny living room. He tries again. "Are you hearing me?" 

Techno feels a sudden wave of crippling nausea flood his mouth. He doesn’t know what to say.

Is there anything left to say at all?

Scratch that.

Is there anything left at all?

“Yeah.” he says, staring squarely at a tiny spider making its home on the edge of his scutes chest. "I'm okay, Phil." _Please go away, please go away._

Memories and flashbacks all whirl into a loud yelling that rings constant in his head. He barely hears Phil’s tired exhale.

“Okay.” Phil says simply. “But I'm staying. I’ll be trading with your villagers downstairs if you want to talk.” 

Philza delays, standing awkwardly. Techno half shrugs at the spider and his shadow in response, still turned away.

The old man studies his son's back. Techno's long braided hair has come half undone, a few lifeless strands hanging limply around his face. His armor is worn out, wasn't he supposed to change it after the war? Phil’s eyes widen slightly at the dirty beer bottle near Techno. Techno never drinks.

Pain stabs Phil in slow, jagged gashes. He wishes to be more useful in his son's misery, but he realises that being here is all he can do.

And just as Techno is about to turn around and curse at him to stop _gawking_ and just leave him alone, for crying out loud, he leaves. 

Techno's eyes catch the last of Phil's farming hat which rapidly disappears to meet the rest of him underneath. His father takes the ladder downstairs, lantern in hand, taking all the warmth in the room with him.

Techno, with nothing more left to take, takes the last disgusting gulp out of his bottle instead. 

The loud ringing in his ears grows. He pushes back against his propaganda wall. A poster of him at his peak hangs behind him, with the message of _‘SUBSCRIBE TO TECHNOBLADE’_ inscribed at the bottom in red lettering.

_I know what I’ve done Technoblade and I hate me for it._

He snaps his neck sideways impulsively, running fingers through his swiftly unravelling braid.

 _But Technoblade, can't you see? The discs—_ Tommy exasperation flashes before his eyes again. How many times is he doomed to relive this? 

_I’m worse than everyone I didn’t wanna be._

Shut up. Shut _up_ , Techno thinks. This isn’t about you, Tommy. Why should everything need to be about you?

_I choose Tubbo._

A beat.

Techno hauls himself up from the floor, knocking the bottle off sideways in the process.

He steadies himself against the wall, inhaling sharply. His eyes blur in and out in rapid motion.

 _Am I going insane?_ He lets his mind run wild for a moment. He considers all the stupid, dumb, _terrible_ things he could do and pass off as his insanity arc.

His heart pangs horribly.

But he couldn’t do that to Philza. He wouldn’t.

That man couldn't take the loss of another son well. But then, was there even anything of this family left?

A sick blur of motion passes his eyes. 

_"Hey, stick with me, Human GPS, I'm gonna get all scared. I'm gonna get scared without you."_

Them on horses, being happy. Tommy's voice mocks him now.

After everything, he muses sardonically.

 _“Why do you do this.”_ He sees Tommy throw his hands out at him in pretense frustration. _“You say words that don't mean anything but you make them sound smart.”_

 _“Tommy, I told you. Technoblade never dies.”_ He hears the ghost of himself say. 

The ghost felt happy around Tommy. That, of course, just like all other good things, is long gone.

An unforeseen and overwhelming wave of anguish surpasses all his feelings. He tries to ground himself but his soul barters with the blind rage inside of him which threatens to destroy everything he cared about.

_After everything, after trusting you with everything, giving you everything— is this how it ends Tommy?_

He slams his fist into the wall with the propaganda poster with all his might, stirring the chests to his side to life.

The pain of the collision burns his hand. Superficial vessels clot, turning his knuckles red and his eyes tear furiously, with the ever-present soreness making them sting like the wrath of a hundred chilies.

But the betrayal hurt the most.

It always did.

He whips around, something dark unlocking within him with a single click. He grabs his trident from a chest that brags to be the most clean.

Dream.

Dream was deceived too. He would help him in this. 

He sifts through his chest. Ender Pearls, check. TNT, check. Gunpowder, check. 

He dresses himself in the darkness in his most elegant armor, throwing out the ones he wore before in haste.

He's going to get his revenge.

He paces back to his potions chest at the rear of his room in three footsteps, stocking on healing, strength and regeneration.

He's going to get his payback.

He turns and strides back to the front and pauses near the door. He's ready.

Technoblade takes one last look at the place he leaves behind. Only one thing left to do.

"I'm leaving Phil. I'll be back soon," he overtones decisively.

"You'll always have me, Techno," Philza’s voice comes up.

Techno presses his lips together, the sides of them almost curling into a melancholy smile. If this house was not to survive all that was about to happen, Phil would still be his home.

And he's okay with that. 

He walks out, trident in hand, into the ruthless northern air. His inventory is full and he has an enemy in mind to befriend. 

It ends today.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! feel free to say hi and make use of the generous comment box below
> 
> as an oneshots person, user sub to me i beg. i need to feed my chickens
> 
> ps, [my twitter](https://twitter.com/REDN0W_) for more bullshit


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